I've been doing a lot of thought about my heart lately...both the physical organ and the figurative, poetic center of emotion. And, as I dine on deep fried chicken fingers and french fries, I've decided...what better day than Valentine's Day than to release my findings.
This baby is a ticking time bomb.
At my physical in December, my cholesterol came back high - 238 when it should be no higher than 200. My arteries are a grease trap. HotAss insists that I should eat my oatmeal everyday, but that goddamn smug Quaker smiling back me just pisses me off. And let's be honest...a heaping bowl of oatmeal feels like wet papier mache moving through your guts. So when it comes to my cholesterol, I'm only giving it a half-hearted effort (HA!). I can't get enough grease in my diet, and I can feel my arteries hardening as we speak.
I've decided that it's not only my arteries turning into concrete viaducts, but my heart must be hardening too. (Go ahead, hum a little Quarterflash here.)
I've heard so many references to my cold, black, cast-iron heart lately, there might be something to it.
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3 comments:
you best be listening to Gary. Oatmeal in the morning with your 12 cups of coffee wouldn't be that hard to do, then you can indulge your grease whims the rest of the day.
You have to be around!!!! I NEED YOU!
I prefer Cream of Wheat...and this mix CD kicks ass. Many thanks ;-)
you never send me mix cds anymore!!!! SNIFF!
EAT YOUR OATMEAL!
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